OK…
There has been a lot on my mind lately but I haven't been making the time to process it.
The biggest problem is my flesh rearing its ugly head and making life difficult.
The most accurate depiction of myself I have found is the Myers Briggs test. The result is 4 letters that each describe aspects of your personality. I will go through each and share how the worst of them have been destroying me lately.
Let’s start with I shall we…
Yes, I am for sure an Introvert. BUT I take this to extreme way too much. If I am tired, or I have had a hard day or I just don’t feel like being nice then I go away and say I need my "I" time. But in reality I want to be selfish and I don’t want to put on a happy face, or walk for 10 minutes in the freezing cold snow to go see a friend who is lonely, or entertain people in my flat. I just want to stay inside and be sad and depressed and lonely and zone out and watch way too much TV or sleep and eat junk food. This is not OK.
We should serve one another in love, always outdo one another with honor etc. etc. http://www.ministryblue.com/studies/serve.html
Next is S
The S makes observations and solves problem through facts they gather through their 5 senses. So we make decisions and observations/judgements based on actual facts we see or experience. Unlike the Ns who kind of like to read between the lines and make observations from abstract ideas or what “could be”. OK….this gets me in trouble because I like to be right and when I am with someone who has a strong opinion about someone or some situation and they have their reasons (gathered through the N mentality) while I have mine (based on facts), it's a problem because I think my reasons are better because they are based on fact, not some assumption or abstract idea.
2 Timothy 2:23
"But refuse (shut your mind against, have nothing to do with) trifling (ill-informed, unedifying, stupid) controversies over ignorant questionings, for you know that they foster strife and breed quarrels."
Now to T…
This one is the one I have been struggling with the most. Thinkers make decisions based on facts and the bottom line. We don’t care about hurting people’s feelings or how our decisions will affect someone else…we have to make a decision because of X and Y fact so we will make the decision no matter what. This also plays out in regretting things. I don’t really tend to dwell on past decisions and wonder if I made the right one, or thinking about how if I made the decision differently it wouldn’t have affected someone in this way and everyone would have been happier.UGH. I can't even stand to hear these thoughts from others most of the time.
BUT… we are supposed to be compassionate and not heartless. I have been realizing I have a lot of hate and unforgiveness in my heart towards some people because of my "thinking" mindset they did something wrong and they hurt me so now I must act a certain way around them and have all these boundaries so I don't get hurt again...well, that is ridiculous because we are called to forgive as Christ forgave us. So, when I am apart from Christ and haven’t been fellowshipping with Him and letting Him live in and through me this is the worst of me. And providentially, God has surrounded me with a ton of "F"--feelers who do care and are sensitive...^&^hooray^&^.
Philippians 2:1-3
"you have any encouragement from being united with Christ, if any comfort from his love, if any fellowship with the Spirit, if any tenderness and compassion, then make my joy complete by being like-minded, having the same love, being one in spirit and purpose. Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit, but in humility consider others better than yourselves."
Read more: http://www.bukisa.com/articles/193687_bible-verses-scriptures-about-compassion#ixzz1Df5nKkL2
J
This means that I like to have a plan to everything and have all my plans set, make to do lists. The opposite is someone who is open to new information and new ideas so they rarely make set plans, kind of fly by the seat of their pants, see what the day will hold kind of thing. I would say that I am a J with work…even though that is quite difficult with teaching because it really does require the most flexibility in the whole world. But I would say this is the part of my flesh that has been the least problematic while being here. I would say I am actually becoming more of a P because that is the culture here…just whatever and it’s almost impossible make any planes ahead of time because no one else has made plans or decided on any dates so you can’t either you have to wait on them. But I have to say it is way more relaxing and I no longer believe I will die from a heart attack at the age of 30.
James 4:13-15
"Come now, you who say, Today or tomorrow we will go into such and such a city and spend a year there and carry on our business and make money. Yet you do not know [the least thing] about what may happen tomorrow. What is the nature of your life? You are [really] but a wisp of vapor (a puff of smoke, a mist) that is visible for a little while and then disappears [into thin air). You ought instead to say, If the Lord is willing, we shall live and we shall do this or that [thing]."
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